(kingman) still life with splenda

so, i wasn't accurate in the title i claimed earlier. the actual title, according to formal documents, is "Director of Children's Activities." i woke up on friday morning to my grandmother taping up "the charts, so everyone knows who's who and what's what." These were four handwritten pages of useful information like the names of everyone coming, and then a chart with the job titles and assignees, and the menu. the menu is something she has been worried about for months, and she has been working hard to keep us to it. it's all very elaborate. here are the official titles, with several names next to each:

Meet Greet and Sweep the Patios
Director of Children's Activities
Entertainment Emcee
Dart Board Score Keeper
Gofer
Family History Note Getter
Table Set-up and Clear
Main Course Maker
Salad Chef (and Relisher)
Dessert Deputy
Bread and Butter Baron
Snack Server
Soft Drink Super
Coffee + Tea Captain
Milk + Juice Joker
Lead in the Chow Line

in addition to Director of Children's Activities (which i immediately delegated to my cousin todd), i am also down for "Salad Chef (and Relisher)." so today i washed some grapes and peeled some oranges. i've been a bit of a slacker here at the lowell/kendrick/roberts family reunion.

and then i narrowly escaped death

before a handsome prince on a white horse (sorry, no photo available) untied me and snapped me from the tracks.

and the rest of the time, i've spent eating punkin' pie and playing this game "rush hour,"

the point of which is to clear the traffic jam so the ice cream truck can get out before the icecream melts (no, justin, you can't just eat the ice cream), with my cousins jacob and charlie (my mother's brother's kids), who are actually younger than my nephews and neices (my sister's kids). i guess it won't be such a big deal that my kids (if i ever have any) will be so much younger than their cousins...there's always their cousin's kids to play with. i'm way behind the curve.

piñata time.
woo.
hoo.
good times.